Australia v Unwashed Filthy Pasty Skins Oarfishel Fred

If it's got balls, it's here
User avatar
andybox
Stew Ingredient
Posts: 27309
Joined: Mon Jan 05, 2009 2:09 am

Australia v Unwashed Filthy Pasty Skins Oarfishel Fred

Post by andybox » Tue Dec 19, 2017 10:17 pm

4th test. Hot weather, a fast hard pitch, Aus bowlers will turn it on again.
Predictions please gentlemen (and Lincoln).
Hands have been clenched in a fist too long

User avatar
Lincoln
Stew Ingredient
Posts: 15302
Joined: Sat Aug 18, 2012 2:38 pm

Re: Australia v Unwashed Filthy Pasty Skins Oarfishel Fred

Post by Lincoln » Tue Dec 19, 2017 10:30 pm

Dity crim turd....England to win by an innings and 20 runs

jedgarandclyde
Stew Ingredient
Posts: 7545
Joined: Sat May 03, 2014 3:30 am

Re: Australia v Unwashed Filthy Pasty Skins Oarfishel Fred

Post by jedgarandclyde » Wed Dec 20, 2017 10:12 am

Going on recent form it is hard to see nothing but an Aussie win, it does take away something from the series when one side is so dominant, and it seems years and years since we had a close hard fought test.

The big question i suppose are the Pomms up for this, and can they make it a real contest and take it to the 5th day?

My tip is that unless the Pomms stop whinging and moaning, and blaming everything on their defeats, they will run a distant 2nd again.
'there are plenty of people out there'..................Donald Trump

User avatar
Geoffers
Stew Ingredient
Posts: 3460
Joined: Sat Sep 22, 2012 11:49 am

Re: Australia v Unwashed Filthy Pasty Skins Oarfishel Fred

Post by Geoffers » Wed Dec 20, 2017 12:51 pm

The Aussies have increased their winning margin in each test, so what next? Win by an innings and 150 runs?

User avatar
Flobster!
Stew Ingredient
Posts: 29953
Joined: Wed Jan 07, 2015 12:12 am

Re: Australia v Unwashed Filthy Pasty Skins Oarfishel Fred

Post by Flobster! » Wed Dec 20, 2017 11:08 pm

Starc might not play.
The pies and sausage rolls are good in Australia - Iolar

User avatar
shunter
Stew Ingredient
Posts: 17014
Joined: Wed Mar 02, 2005 1:56 pm

Re: Australia v Unwashed Filthy Pasty Skins Oarfishel Fred

Post by shunter » Thu Dec 21, 2017 6:52 am

You’d have to be a lunatic to predict anything but a thumping Australian win.

Can cook get a 50 this time for old times saje?

Will there be retirements at the end of the series? Cook, Anderson, broad? I’d imagine Anderson will want the England summer season, broad will still think he’s got something to offer even if it’s only because there’s so little completion for his place. I wonder if cook can be motivated to continue. His career record is excellent and what’s the point in continuing to fail to live up to it.
1988: "We have a climate in Britain in which business wants to succeed and can succeed." Margaret Thatcher, speech to launch the European Single Market

2018: "Fuck business." Boris Johnson

User avatar
Geoffers
Stew Ingredient
Posts: 3460
Joined: Sat Sep 22, 2012 11:49 am

Re: Australia v Unwashed Filthy Pasty Skins Oarfishel Fred

Post by Geoffers » Thu Dec 21, 2017 8:09 am

Shunter, the answer is money, and having no other skills.

User avatar
rosstralia
Stew Ingredient
Posts: 3281
Joined: Sat Aug 25, 2012 2:55 pm

Re: Australia v Unwashed Filthy Pasty Skins Oarfishel Fred

Post by rosstralia » Thu Dec 21, 2017 11:20 am

They should drop Cock from the side. The series is lost. Hes contributed nothing and there's no way he'll be back for another Ashes here. Is there another batsmen with the tour who could be given a go.

As for this next test. Just like the previous three ............... Australia Far Too Much - England Not Nearly Enough
The poster below is a moron

User avatar
shunter
Stew Ingredient
Posts: 17014
Joined: Wed Mar 02, 2005 1:56 pm

Re: Australia v Unwashed Filthy Pasty Skins Oarfishel Fred

Post by shunter » Thu Dec 21, 2017 8:27 pm

Geoffers wrote:Shunter, the answer is money, and having no other skills.


Can’t imagine he’d bother for the money and could get some kind of cricket job and he has a young family
1988: "We have a climate in Britain in which business wants to succeed and can succeed." Margaret Thatcher, speech to launch the European Single Market

2018: "Fuck business." Boris Johnson

User avatar
Stephen_Dedalus
Stew Ingredient
Posts: 69024
Joined: Fri Jun 06, 2014 7:11 pm

Re: Australia v Unwashed Filthy Pasty Skins Oarfishel Fred

Post by Stephen_Dedalus » Thu Dec 21, 2017 8:31 pm

Cook is a farmer by trade, as in he owns, lives on and works on a farm.

He also describes farming as his passion outside cricket.

User avatar
Lincoln
Stew Ingredient
Posts: 15302
Joined: Sat Aug 18, 2012 2:38 pm

Re: Australia v Unwashed Filthy Pasty Skins Oarfishel Fred

Post by Lincoln » Thu Dec 21, 2017 10:37 pm

shunter wrote:
Geoffers wrote:Shunter, the answer is money, and having no other skills.


Can’t imagine he’d bother for the money and could get some kind of cricket job and he has a young family


Jimmy was noticeable on the TV as a pundit this past summer,it did make me think that perhaps he has one eye on the next move.

I think the ECB has to be accountable for this awful showing....where's the youngsters coming through,millions were spent on the "Chance to shine" initiative....the idea being to get more kids into cricket,but where's the fast bowlers?...spinners? Surely there should have been a few coming through by now??

User avatar
shunter
Stew Ingredient
Posts: 17014
Joined: Wed Mar 02, 2005 1:56 pm

Re: Australia v Unwashed Filthy Pasty Skins Oarfishel Fred

Post by shunter » Thu Dec 21, 2017 11:51 pm

The centre of excellence or whatever it’s called has produced or improved nobody. But it’s the pitches as well - they favour medium pacers who can make the duke ball nip around a bit when it’s old.
1988: "We have a climate in Britain in which business wants to succeed and can succeed." Margaret Thatcher, speech to launch the European Single Market

2018: "Fuck business." Boris Johnson

User avatar
grecian
Stew Ingredient
Posts: 16511
Joined: Mon Aug 13, 2012 1:41 pm

Re: Australia v Unwashed Filthy Pasty Skins Oarfishel Fred

Post by grecian » Fri Dec 22, 2017 7:15 pm

Graham Swann to replace Chemical Ali and get figures of 0-234 before lunch - assuming that the Crims win the To55 for once...

When's the next ship home leaving?

User avatar
andybox
Stew Ingredient
Posts: 27309
Joined: Mon Jan 05, 2009 2:09 am

Re: Australia v Unwashed Filthy Pasty Skins Oarfishel Fred

Post by andybox » Sat Dec 23, 2017 10:54 pm

Starc being rested due to an injured foot. MCG, 80k people, what have England got left? I have a feeling this will be the test of the series.
Hands have been clenched in a fist too long

User avatar
Flobster!
Stew Ingredient
Posts: 29953
Joined: Wed Jan 07, 2015 12:12 am

Re: Australia v Unwashed Filthy Pasty Skins Oarfishel Fred

Post by Flobster! » Sun Dec 24, 2017 12:23 am

Yes. Should be big scores. Depends who collapses.
The pies and sausage rolls are good in Australia - Iolar

User avatar
Flobster!
Stew Ingredient
Posts: 29953
Joined: Wed Jan 07, 2015 12:12 am

Re: Australia v Unwashed Filthy Pasty Skins Oarfishel Fred

Post by Flobster! » Sun Dec 24, 2017 3:10 am

Overton's out.
The pies and sausage rolls are good in Australia - Iolar

User avatar
Red_V
Stew Ingredient
Posts: 217
Joined: Mon Feb 16, 2015 5:59 am

Re: Australia v Unwashed Filthy Pasty Skins Oarfishel Fred

Post by Red_V » Sun Dec 24, 2017 3:51 am

Roger that...Over and out!

jedgarandclyde
Stew Ingredient
Posts: 7545
Joined: Sat May 03, 2014 3:30 am

Re: Australia v Unwashed Filthy Pasty Skins Oarfishel Fred

Post by jedgarandclyde » Sun Dec 24, 2017 8:41 am

Smith was in pain after he was hit in injured right hand by a ball in the nets, but he will be OK for the test it seems...................................................http://www.bbc.com/sport/cricket/42464792
'there are plenty of people out there'..................Donald Trump

User avatar
andybox
Stew Ingredient
Posts: 27309
Joined: Mon Jan 05, 2009 2:09 am

Re: Australia v Unwashed Filthy Pasty Skins Oarfishel Fred

Post by andybox » Tue Dec 26, 2017 5:47 am

Smith is looking ominous. Warner out on a no ball at 99, much to the dismay of the English players and crowd. 104 for Warner, a good knock. Still over an hour to play, they might up the tempo for the final 6 overs.
Hands have been clenched in a fist too long

User avatar
Flobster!
Stew Ingredient
Posts: 29953
Joined: Wed Jan 07, 2015 12:12 am

Re: Australia v Unwashed Filthy Pasty Skins Oarfishel Fred

Post by Flobster! » Tue Dec 26, 2017 5:49 am

Thre were big cheers when Warner was caught. Crowd must be half Poms.
The pies and sausage rolls are good in Australia - Iolar

User avatar
andybox
Stew Ingredient
Posts: 27309
Joined: Mon Jan 05, 2009 2:09 am

Re: Australia v Unwashed Filthy Pasty Skins Oarfishel Fred

Post by andybox » Tue Dec 26, 2017 6:11 am

What’s the crowd figures?
Hands have been clenched in a fist too long

jedgarandclyde
Stew Ingredient
Posts: 7545
Joined: Sat May 03, 2014 3:30 am

Re: Australia v Unwashed Filthy Pasty Skins Oarfishel Fred

Post by jedgarandclyde » Tue Dec 26, 2017 4:52 pm

http://www.bbc.com/sport/cricket/42482346

Looks like it will be SOS again.

[SOS=Same Old Shit]
'there are plenty of people out there'..................Donald Trump

User avatar
Lincoln
Stew Ingredient
Posts: 15302
Joined: Sat Aug 18, 2012 2:38 pm

Re: Australia v Unwashed Filthy Pasty Skins Oarfishel Fred

Post by Lincoln » Tue Dec 26, 2017 5:22 pm

Flobster! wrote: Crowd must be half Poms.


No, the crowd is 100% poms...ive been telling you this for ages now...you are ALL English.

User avatar
andybox
Stew Ingredient
Posts: 27309
Joined: Mon Jan 05, 2009 2:09 am

Re: Australia v Unwashed Filthy Pasty Skins Oarfishel Fred

Post by andybox » Tue Dec 26, 2017 8:42 pm

Lincoln wrote:
Flobster! wrote: Crowd must be half Poms.


No, the crowd is 100% poms...ive been telling you this for ages now...you are ALL English.

Except for the Greeks, the Italian, the Sth Africans, the Irish...
Hands have been clenched in a fist too long

User avatar
Lincoln
Stew Ingredient
Posts: 15302
Joined: Sat Aug 18, 2012 2:38 pm

Re: Australia v Unwashed Filthy Pasty Skins Oarfishel Fred

Post by Lincoln » Tue Dec 26, 2017 10:21 pm

The Saffers and bogtrotters are English...the wops and the yoghurt munchers perhaps not....i'll give you that but i bet they wish they were.

User avatar
Flobster!
Stew Ingredient
Posts: 29953
Joined: Wed Jan 07, 2015 12:12 am

Re: Australia v Unwashed Filthy Pasty Skins Oarfishel Fred

Post by Flobster! » Tue Dec 26, 2017 10:57 pm

Lincoln wrote:
Flobster! wrote: Crowd must be half Poms.


No, the crowd is 100% poms...ive been telling you this for ages now...you are ALL English.


I'm Scottish and Irish thank you very much.
The pies and sausage rolls are good in Australia - Iolar

User avatar
Red_V
Stew Ingredient
Posts: 217
Joined: Mon Feb 16, 2015 5:59 am

Re: Australia v Unwashed Filthy Pasty Skins Oarfishel Fred

Post by Red_V » Wed Dec 27, 2017 5:00 am

The barmy army are well lubricated.

User avatar
Flobster!
Stew Ingredient
Posts: 29953
Joined: Wed Jan 07, 2015 12:12 am

Re: Australia v Unwashed Filthy Pasty Skins Oarfishel Fred

Post by Flobster! » Wed Dec 27, 2017 7:03 am

Poor Poms - now they're stuck with Cook for a few more years.
The pies and sausage rolls are good in Australia - Iolar

jedgarandclyde
Stew Ingredient
Posts: 7545
Joined: Sat May 03, 2014 3:30 am

Re: Australia v Unwashed Filthy Pasty Skins Oarfishel Fred

Post by jedgarandclyde » Wed Dec 27, 2017 7:22 am

I did say that Captain Cook and Mr Root might have something to say in the series, so i got the test wrong, it took them a while to get going, but boy did they sure get going in this test!

'Onya you two, well played!!
'there are plenty of people out there'..................Donald Trump

User avatar
shunter
Stew Ingredient
Posts: 17014
Joined: Wed Mar 02, 2005 1:56 pm

Re: Australia v Unwashed Filthy Pasty Skins Oarfishel Fred

Post by shunter » Wed Dec 27, 2017 10:43 am

Good to see cook Anderson and broad do well because if they retire at the end of the series England are screwed for the next few years - can’t see much evidence of anyone coming along to match them
1988: "We have a climate in Britain in which business wants to succeed and can succeed." Margaret Thatcher, speech to launch the European Single Market

2018: "Fuck business." Boris Johnson

User avatar
andybox
Stew Ingredient
Posts: 27309
Joined: Mon Jan 05, 2009 2:09 am

Re: Australia v Unwashed Filthy Pasty Skins Oarfishel Fred

Post by andybox » Wed Dec 27, 2017 10:50 am

Great knock from Cook, good to see him showing some form.
Hands have been clenched in a fist too long

User avatar
Lincoln
Stew Ingredient
Posts: 15302
Joined: Sat Aug 18, 2012 2:38 pm

Re: Australia v Unwashed Filthy Pasty Skins Oarfishel Fred

Post by Lincoln » Wed Dec 27, 2017 12:09 pm

shunter wrote:Good to see cook Anderson and broad do well because if they retire at the end of the series England are screwed for the next few years - can’t see much evidence of anyone coming along to match them


And herein lies the problem,where the fcuk are our future bowlers?...ok,so Curran,Roland No escape are ok but they ain't game changers are they.

User avatar
andybox
Stew Ingredient
Posts: 27309
Joined: Mon Jan 05, 2009 2:09 am

Re: Australia v Unwashed Filthy Pasty Skins Oarfishel Fred

Post by andybox » Wed Dec 27, 2017 9:47 pm

Still 130 odd behind, who does England have left for wielding the willow? Very flat wicket, hope it improves today. Looking like a draw.
Hands have been clenched in a fist too long

User avatar
Red_V
Stew Ingredient
Posts: 217
Joined: Mon Feb 16, 2015 5:59 am

Re: Australia v Unwashed Filthy Pasty Skins Oarfishel Fred

Post by Red_V » Thu Dec 28, 2017 8:09 am

A magnificent 244* from Cook (the highest score from a visiting batsman at the MCG) and the tail finally wagging for the poms have put them in a match winning situation.With a lead of 164 they can't lose unless of course Warner goes berserk in the morning.

User avatar
andybox
Stew Ingredient
Posts: 27309
Joined: Mon Jan 05, 2009 2:09 am

Re: Australia v Unwashed Filthy Pasty Skins Oarfishel Fred

Post by andybox » Thu Dec 28, 2017 9:50 am

Pretty amazing knock from an out of form Cook. Incredible if you think about it. On the road for 250, really tough for Aus to get anything better than a draw from here. England's game to lose.
Hands have been clenched in a fist too long

User avatar
Flobster!
Stew Ingredient
Posts: 29953
Joined: Wed Jan 07, 2015 12:12 am

Re: Australia v Unwashed Filthy Pasty Skins Oarfishel Fred

Post by Flobster! » Thu Dec 28, 2017 12:01 pm

Apparently no-one has carried their bat in a test at the MCG.
The pies and sausage rolls are good in Australia - Iolar

User avatar
Flobster!
Stew Ingredient
Posts: 29953
Joined: Wed Jan 07, 2015 12:12 am

Re: Australia v Unwashed Filthy Pasty Skins Oarfishel Fred

Post by Flobster! » Fri Dec 29, 2017 1:17 am

Hmmmmmmm ... England to win in 4 days???
The pies and sausage rolls are good in Australia - Iolar

User avatar
andybox
Stew Ingredient
Posts: 27309
Joined: Mon Jan 05, 2009 2:09 am

Re: Australia v Unwashed Filthy Pasty Skins Oarfishel Fred

Post by andybox » Fri Dec 29, 2017 6:17 am

Possibly. Take a look at Lincoln’s tip above. He might be on the money. Anderson out first ball, I was cheering Cook on for 250 or 300. Still, it was an amazing thing to watch.
Hands have been clenched in a fist too long

User avatar
Flobster!
Stew Ingredient
Posts: 29953
Joined: Wed Jan 07, 2015 12:12 am

Re: Australia v Unwashed Filthy Pasty Skins Oarfishel Fred

Post by Flobster! » Fri Dec 29, 2017 6:46 am

No Stokes, no England.
No Starc, no Australia.
The pies and sausage rolls are good in Australia - Iolar

User avatar
andybox
Stew Ingredient
Posts: 27309
Joined: Mon Jan 05, 2009 2:09 am

Re: Australia v Unwashed Filthy Pasty Skins Oarfishel Fred

Post by andybox » Fri Dec 29, 2017 8:39 am

What was Anderson doing to the Kookaburra??? Comments, Lincoln?
Hands have been clenched in a fist too long

jedgarandclyde
Stew Ingredient
Posts: 7545
Joined: Sat May 03, 2014 3:30 am

Re: Australia v Unwashed Filthy Pasty Skins Oarfishel Fred

Post by jedgarandclyde » Fri Dec 29, 2017 9:34 am

Given their history, that charge will be laid against the Pomms, but shall we let that one go to the keeper, and let the umpires have the call?
'there are plenty of people out there'..................Donald Trump

User avatar
Red_V
Stew Ingredient
Posts: 217
Joined: Mon Feb 16, 2015 5:59 am

Re: Australia v Unwashed Filthy Pasty Skins Oarfishel Fred

Post by Red_V » Sat Dec 30, 2017 4:24 am

The curator of the MCG pitch would be better suited to the concrete business.

User avatar
Flobster!
Stew Ingredient
Posts: 29953
Joined: Wed Jan 07, 2015 12:12 am

Re: Australia v Unwashed Filthy Pasty Skins Oarfishel Fred

Post by Flobster! » Sat Dec 30, 2017 5:51 am

Draw.
The pies and sausage rolls are good in Australia - Iolar

jedgarandclyde
Stew Ingredient
Posts: 7545
Joined: Sat May 03, 2014 3:30 am

Re: Australia v Unwashed Filthy Pasty Skins Oarfishel Fred

Post by jedgarandclyde » Sat Dec 30, 2017 2:47 pm

Yeah, the pitch was crappy wasn't it?
'there are plenty of people out there'..................Donald Trump

User avatar
Lincoln
Stew Ingredient
Posts: 15302
Joined: Sat Aug 18, 2012 2:38 pm

Re: Australia v Unwashed Filthy Pasty Skins Oarfishel Fred

Post by Lincoln » Sat Dec 30, 2017 4:04 pm

Well if it was crappy then the club should be fined as per the rooles...that fat bastard-crim David Boon fined my club (Notts) for a bad pitch,cheeky crim scum bag.

jedgarandclyde
Stew Ingredient
Posts: 7545
Joined: Sat May 03, 2014 3:30 am

Re: Australia v Unwashed Filthy Pasty Skins Oarfishel Fred

Post by jedgarandclyde » Sat Dec 30, 2017 7:16 pm

Boonee is one fair dinkum, true blue Aussie hero, still holds the record for the number of cans of the amber liquid drunk on a flight from Aussie to pommyland.

A real Green and Gold hero!!!

[He could also bat a bit]
'there are plenty of people out there'..................Donald Trump

User avatar
Lincoln
Stew Ingredient
Posts: 15302
Joined: Sat Aug 18, 2012 2:38 pm

Re: Australia v Unwashed Filthy Pasty Skins Oarfishel Fred

Post by Lincoln » Sat Dec 30, 2017 8:08 pm

Agreed Smithy is in a class of his own(maybe Kholi is there too)....well played Australia,you deserve these Ashes.

You won't have them for long though you cunts so don't get used to it.

jedgarandclyde
Stew Ingredient
Posts: 7545
Joined: Sat May 03, 2014 3:30 am

Re: Australia v Unwashed Filthy Pasty Skins Oarfishel Fred

Post by jedgarandclyde » Sat Dec 30, 2017 10:30 pm

'there are plenty of people out there'..................Donald Trump

User avatar
Red_V
Stew Ingredient
Posts: 217
Joined: Mon Feb 16, 2015 5:59 am

Re: Australia v Unwashed Filthy Pasty Skins Oarfishel Fred

Post by Red_V » Sun Dec 31, 2017 1:38 am

One of Australia's finest openers and no one better at short-leg.

Boonie for PM!

User avatar
Meatfree
Stew Ingredient
Posts: 1745
Joined: Thu Feb 21, 2013 9:28 am

Re: Australia v Unwashed Filthy Pasty Skins Oarfishel Fred

Post by Meatfree » Sun Dec 31, 2017 6:28 pm

The whole Boone thing makes me laugh. If an England player did that on the plane on the way over to this Ashes, the Aussies, and every other media, would crucify him.
Personally, I've no issue with it. Like when Flintoff was off his face after we won.

Post Reply